Assalamualaikum and hi.
I felt incredibly unproductive at times. Seriously. I've been binge watching too much of wahlietv vlogs lately, I sit and watch the clouds, I annoy my little sister and sometimes wonder why I am not Kylie Jenner lol. Anyway, I was scrolling my twitter timeline and I terbaca a quote that goes "The minute you settle for something less than you deserve, you get even less than what you settled for." Oh boy, I terus terpanggil nak buat this post.
So, sometimes when you're all alone with yourself for hours and hours and hours every day, you really start to figure out how you see yourself. You overthink things about yourself. You put all the blames to yourself. "Why am I not this?" "Why am I not that?" Basically, you just questioning yourself lah is what I'm trying to say. And it starts to come out in the very strangest ways. Let's be honest, I've done it so many times that I've lost count.
Actually, bila I fikir balik, I deserve more. You deserve more. You deserve better. You're not an option. You're not a plan B. You need to know you're not the invisible one standing at the back. You're not the only one who make time for him. You both have to. And you're not the one who need to make excuses for him. "He's busy." "He has issues with his friends."
You're not just an average. You are worthy to be chosen, to be loved and respected. This whole "I didn't do so much things for him, so I don't deserve all his love." is a trash. Don't be afraid to think that you're not worthy enough to be claimed. Yes, it's true sometimes kita rasa macam tu but I think that's it. You tak perlu ulang lagi like a tape recorder. And one more thing, what's with the "I can't set my standard really high up there because I might end up alone." thing? For me, it's better to be alone than taken for granted.
The one that loves you will not afraid to say it. If he loves you, he won't even let his eyes shut because the idea of giving another man the chance to swoop in is just unacceptable ;)
So yeah, thanks for reading this. I'm not so good with words but as long as you get the point! Title macam tak kena-mengena sikit but oh well, the title is always the hardest lol. Till then.